Sunday, February 20, 2011

for women only. the book.

At my small office, I am the only young single. When my good-hearted coworker handed me two relationship/dating books, I sighed, might have muttered something, and put the books on the bottom of the pile on my bookcase. After weeks of collecting dust and for reasons unbeknownst to me, I picked one up and started reading.

I couldn't put it down. 

If you are a woman, you must read for women only by Shaunti Feldhahn. It's been a long time since I've been "in love" and quite frankly, I've avoided it. All the evidence seems to point to men only wanting women around for sex, and to women only wanting men around for free food and the chance to point out all the ways they are so not like the real men in romantic comedies. Not enticing. I'd rather be on my own, thank you very much. 

 If what I just read in this book is true, I have great reason to hope that two people can be in love because they deeply enjoy each other and have willingly committed to each other for life. Yes, I said willingly. I also discovered that there is a lot more depth and goodness to men than women like to admit. And that women are more responsible for our current complaints with men than women like to admit. I don't say that to put a guilt trip on women, and the author certainly doesn't approach it that way. But I closed the book feeling an immense (but exhilarating) responsibility to the man I marry and to men in general. 

Women have the power to make or break a man, and I think we've misfired. Big time. I've decided that in my life, it's time to reboot. It's time to stop believing what other people say about men and women and start believing in men and respecting them for who they are. I need to get on my knees and ask God to help, because these preconceptions are years old and they run deep. But it is possible to change, and it must begin right here, in my own heart and mind. But by golly, it is worth every ounce of effort! I'm pumped. 

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